So, buckle your seat belts and hold on tight to those controllers because this isn't your grandma's boss fight.
I arrived at the con in the mid-afternoon. The first panel that I managed to make was a panel concerning my favorite YouTuber Markiplier.
This panel was more for personal interest in the celebrity than for my project. Therefore the only information I have to report is that it was completely awesome to meet my favorite YouTuber. The other panel that I was interested in going to was later that day.
Unfortunately, I was unable to make the panel due to train scheduling problems. It was a sad situation, but I'm hoping to find a recording of the panel somewhere online. That way, I'm able to watch it and experience it despite having to leave the convention without seeing it.
After making my way out of the panel and down onto the convention floor, I was, well, floored by how large the convention was. Large booths were more small cities that were bordered by lines of people that wrapped around them. Below are some pictures I managed to take while on the convention floor, but I will be honest in that they don't do the sheer huge-ness of the show justice.
My overall experience at the convention was great. It was a convention that I have longed to go to since I was young. And everything that I got to try was amazing. Yet there were some parts of the day that tore away at the fun that I was having.
The first part was some attendees' reciprocation of cosplayers. Now, just as with every convention, I decided to go in cosplay. My costume choice was to do a cute, human version of the Pokémon Umbreon.
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To keep a long description short, my outfit consisted of: a skirt with attached tail, crop top, tights, boots, a beanie with ears, and an under bust corset. Because Umbreon is a Dark type Pokémon, I wanted to keep the design dark, Gothic, but cute, fun and recognizable. I got stopped for photographs quite a bit and my character was recognized. All in all I thought it was a good cosplay. However, there were some people on the convention floor who didn't enjoy, not just my cosplaying, but cosplaying in general quite as much.
Quite often, I would find myself overhearing comments about my cosplay. Whether it was my choice to wear a corset or how "short" -- apparently just above my knees is 'short' -- my skirt was, it seemed as though what I was wearing was of huge concern to the people around me. Being a cosplayer for three years, I know that I will be judged by everyone who sees me on the floor. Cosplay is a subculture where critiquing is commonplace. Yet, when my cosplay one of the more covering cosplays I saw that day, I started to get irritated that what I was wearing was causing concern.
The topic of cosplayers being at the convention was a subject that seemed to bring strife to some attendees. It seemed as though that every time I was stopped for a picture or had a compliment given to me, there was a time when someone made a comment about "how much cosplaying is ruining PAX" or "how these 'fake' gamers are only there to cosplay" or "how cosplayers shouldn't bother with coming." It was disheartening to say the least, but I could understand their points.
PAXEast is a widely recognized video gaming convention. It's a place for major video game companies to come forward and show off their newest toys and games to the masses. It's a place for Independent - "Indie" - developers to bring in media attention to their newer titles. It's a place for tabletop companies to give you exclusive releases to add to your decks. The core interest of the convention is gaming. So it's natural for long-time, dedicated PAX con-goers to be distressed to see cosplay growing in popularity at the convention. However, I personally think that completely discrediting someone just because they chose to come in costume to a gaming convention is ridiculous and elitist. Cosplay is a fantastic and creative way to show appreciation for all nerd media. Whether it's comic books, television shows, movies, or, yes, video games, to put the time and effort to make and wear a costume of a character shows a level of fan appreciation that I, again personally, think goes beyond just loving the medium their from. And while yes it can be annoying to try and move around someone in large, Worbla armor that lights up and takes up the space of two people, saying that cosplay is "ruining" the convention is simply untrue.
The second part was the concern of my sex. Throughout the day, I found myself stuck in a situation that, sadly, is all too common for me: the treatment of female gamers. Being a gamer and being a woman has always lead to some difficult situations. I have been pushed aside, laughed at, scoffed at. But, at the same time, I've been seen as some mythical being emerging from the mists of fantasy when my male counterparts realize that I wasn't a "fake gamer girl." And I wasn't able to escape this treatment at PAX.
At some booths, I would struggle to keep my place in line. One attendee cut in front of me and, after I politely explained that I was in line, he bluntly said "Oh...I just thought you were waiting in line with your boyfriend." At other booths, I found exhibitors explaining aspects of the game and answering questions to my partner or my male friends when I was the one who asked the question or made the inquiry. I had to stand in front of my partner at one booth because the exhibitor almost refused to answer me.
But, the experience that stands out most in my head would have to be the moment that I was the subject to uncomfortable harassment by an attendee. To read about that, check out the stand alone post I made about it.
PAXEast 2015 was an overall good experience. I had fun, I saw a lot of neat games and technologies, and I managed to meet a few of my idols. Yet, there were some lead linings to this cloud 9 experience. Despite the changes made in the recent years following the GamerGate controversy and other nerd culture icons speaking out, I still found myself in the position I've been in for most of my life: receiving different treatment because I was a woman who identified as a gamer. But instead of ripping my fun from me, it fueled my passion. It pushed me to keep on going forward with this blog and this area of study. There is so much more that needs to be done to bring about change and I'm not giving up.
I may have lost a life in this boss fight, but I have two more. And I'm not wasting either of them.
Gawd, it's like a license to be sexist for some people.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you (otherwise) had fun.
I'm so glad you had a good time! It sucks that you were treated differently due to your gender. I've experience some discrimination in my career simply because I'm a woman, so I know it hurts and its unfair. But you have the right attitude and the only way to ensure they keep winning is to stop being you. Don't ever stop cosplaying just because of these gender issues and you never know who you might inspire.
ReplyDeleteI do agree that gender tends to be a problem at conventions – I have had my share of trouble at these sort of events myself. I'm a writer/producer/director, and my ex was my sound engineer; often times, people introducing themselves to us would ask "Which film was yours?" of my boyfriend, and "which film did you work on?" of me. The distinction did not go unnoticed.
ReplyDeleteThat said, I would say that the way you approach it in some of your writing is troublesome to me – it has a tendency to play on the side of victimization, which doesn't help the strong female cosplay warrior persona you're going for. For instance, rather than point out the specific comments made about you, I would focus on the comments made of cosplay as a whole. I would add in any other sexist moments that you noticed occurring to other women, and perhaps also look at the position women hold in the convention – game developers or (the term i detest) merely "booth babes"?
Also, from the standing point of a reviewer, I would focus on removing the part about missing the panel – its a bit of a bait and switch in your greater narrative – perhaps including a segment on listing the other panels that looked interesting that you didn't see.
Finally, some of the parts where you are discussing your issues with the convention, you belabor your point a bit much and use non-specific words (i.e. fantastic) for why something is good. In addition, you tend to couch your opinions in "IMHO" type phrases. You're making an argument for cosplay; be definite and concise. For instance:
PAXEast is a widely recognized video gaming convention. It's a place for major video game companies to come forward and show off their newest toys and games to the masses. It's a place for Independent - "Indie" - developers to bring in media attention to their newer titles. It's a place for tabletop companies to give you exclusive releases to add to your decks. The core interest of the convention is gaming. So it's natural for long-time, dedicated PAX con-goers to be distressed to see cosplay growing in popularity at the convention. However, I personally think that completely discrediting someone just because they chose to come in costume to a gaming convention is ridiculous and elitist. Cosplay is a fantastic and creative way to show appreciation for all nerd media. Whether it's comic books, television shows, movies, or, yes, video games, to put the time and effort to make and wear a costume of a character shows a level of fan appreciation that I, again personally, think goes beyond just loving the medium their from. And while yes it can be annoying to try and move around someone in large, Worbla armor that lights up and takes up the space of two people, saying that cosplay is "ruining" the convention is simply untrue.
Might be better as:
PAXEast is a gaming convention: a place for major companies, indie developers and tabletop companies to come forward and show off their newest toys and games and get media attention. It's natural for long-time, dedicated con-goers to be distressed to see cosplay growing in popularity. However, completely discrediting someone because they chose to come in costume is elitist. Cosplay is a creative way to show appreciation for all nerd media, whether it's comic books, television shows, movies, or, yes, video games. Cosplayers put in time and effort to make and wear a costume, and that shows a huge level of fan appreciation. And while it can be annoying to try and move around someone in large Worbla armor, saying that cosplay is "ruining" the convention is simply untrue.
Hope this helps!
VM